Or Are You Just Pleased To See Me?
by potatoes-are-not-for-sex
Summary: with DovahFinn! :D A collection of KickTheStickz stories about.. erections. Yep, all the maturity awards here :P One for every letter of the alphabet!
1. A is for Awkward

**A is for Awkward**

**By DovahFinn**

[see note at end for explanation as to how this even happens.]

PJ and Chris were sitting snug on Chris's couch, watching Teletubbies and acting amused. Chris was really getting a kick out of it; he added his own commentary and made disgustingly perverted jokes about the innocent children's characters. PJ would laugh when necessary, but he couldn't quite bring himself to focus on the screen- he was too busy imagining how soft Chris's lips might be against his. He fell into a daze, imagining himself pressing his lips against Chris's and Chris doing the same as he tangled his fingers into his soft hair-  
"Peej! Earth to Peej!" snapped Chris. PJ blinked out of his thoughts and looked at Chris like a deer caught in the headlights.  
"H-huh?" PJ stuttered. Chris rolled his eyes, standing up.  
"I'm gonna go get my toast before it burns. Be a good little slut and stay there, eh?" he joked. PJ nodded and let the slut remark roll off of him; he knew Chris didn't mean it. He glanced down and- oh god. His eyes widened and he felt his breath catch.  
"Shit," he whispered. His own imagination had given him a boner- In Chris's living room- On Chris's couch- About Chris. He stood up and speedwalked towards the bathroom just to hear Chris chide from the kitchen;  
"Hey, little slut, what did I tell you about getting up?" PJ chuckled loud enough for Chris to hear.  
"I don't think you want me to pee all over the couch, do you?" he retaliated.  
"Hmm.. Fair enough. Continue on," ordered Chris, just walking into the room with his toast. PJ rushed into the bathroom and closed the door behind him, locking it. He looked down at the bulge again.  
"Well.. Shit."

* * *

_Ehehe welcome to the newest collection- an alphabet of erection moments with Chris and PJ :D We hope you enjoy! Inspired by the ever-beautiful genius DovahFinn who sent me this first section, you're the best XD I'm gonna continue one for each letter of the alphabet- you know the drill! If you have a suggestion for any word from C onwards, leave it in the reviews and we'll see how it goes! Reminder to go give DovahFinn your loving for this brilliant chapter, entirely her work :D _

_Next section will be posted in two hours! xx panfs_


	2. B is for Banana

**B is for Bananas**

"Peej. Hey, Peej. Pee-jaaay!" Chris calls out to his friend on the couch, failing to entice a glance.

"I'm editing Chris! Don't make me regret letting you stay over when I have a uni project due!" He sighs, pulling out his earphones, turning to face Chris, "Well, what so important that-"

Chris is holding out his hand, a banana in the place of each finger, and waving them at PJ, a mad smile on his face.

"MY HANDS ARE BANANAS!"

PJ chuckles, then- "Ew, Chris! It's bad enough that you wasted ten on your fingers, did you really have to go put one in your pants too?"

He turns away before he can see Chris' mortified expression, apparently he'd gotten a little too excited about pranking his friend.

* * *

_*giggles* everyone has their guilty pleasure XD and if you havn't seen it, look up 'My hands are bananas' on Youtube! Very funny stuff XD This chapter is for NeverlandNat and DovahFinn, for their excellent level of maturity :D_

_Thanks for reading!_

_xxx panfs_


	3. C is for Church

**C is for Church**

[mild swearing. also this is not concerning religion in any way. just erections XD]

Double sleepovers with Chris were the best.

They meant double movie nights, double pancakes for breakfast at 3am- but it also meant they were all dragged by Chris' grandma to church on Sunday morning.

PJ had nothing personally against Agatha. She'd been living with Chris as long as he could remember; crochet cap, long woolen socks and blue eye shadow always slightly misaimed on her skin. You could always rely on her for an excellent rendition regarding what she called her 'glory days'- when she'd danced with the Mayor's son, or pinched the best apple from the local market for her sick little brother- sometimes she even had small, hard candy wrapped in obnoxiously noisy cellophane, which she'd hand out to them when she thought Chris' mother wasn't looking.

No, Agatha was always a part of the fun- except for Sunday mornings.

PJ's family was not particularly religious, they did presents for Christmas, and chocolate for Easter and that was about all. Chris wasn't personally very religious, but his grandma insisted on his attending church every Sunday, and double sleepovers meant that PJ was hauled along as well.

Usually, Saturday night was horror movies, which left the boys curled up close beneath Chris' blanket, scared witless at 2am and unable to sleep. This was remedied with My Little Pony and Pokémon until they felt safe again, so by the time it was 8am and they were being pulled out of bed, they had had little more than two or three hours sleep.

This particular Sunday morning, having previously watched 'Hide and Seek', and then 'The Hills Have Eyes', PJ wakes to the blearing of Chris' alarm with a less than joyous expression smeared across his face. With languid limbs and lethargic lopes, they trudge to the car, and enjoy a small respite in the drive to the local church, where the seats were unfortunately (purposefully, PJ always accused) far too uncomfortable to sleep in.

It's not until about twenty minutes in, as he's observing the rather beautifully ornate windows that lined the sides of the hall, that PJ notices Chris, chewing absentmindedly on his lower lip. His brow is slightly furrowed in distant frustration, and his eyes are gazing off at an auspicious, distant point across the room. It's another few minutes later that PJ realizes that he is still fixated on Chris' lip, and the rather relentless attention it's being given by his gnawing teeth. And it's a few minutes after that when he realizes that he really, really wished it were his own teeth digging into the soft, pink skin.

PJ's mind begins to wander and soon is lost in fantasy- their legs entwined between the sheets, Chris' naked chest, taut under him, his hand closed around Chris' wrists playfully, pressing them above their heads, as PJ slowly devours those soft lips to the discordant sighs escaping from beneath his mouth…

_Oh_. _Shit_.

His jeans suddenly painfully tight, PJ had no need to look down to confirm what was happening. Silently thanking his earlier self for grabbing a bible from the counter at the entrance, he moves it slightly to cover his crotch, hoping it isn't obvious what he is doing. His heart drops as Chris leans over to whisper in his ear.

"What do you think you're doing, ey?" Chris waggles his eyebrows suggestively.

_Shit, shit, shit. Play it cool._

"Nothing? Praying?" Agatha looks over and frowns at their hushed exchanges. PJ lowers his voice a little more. "Why, what's wrong?"

Chris grins at him, "You planning on stealing that bible then? Why's it going under your jumper?" PJ looks down, relieved to see that his _issue_ is well covered, noticing the edge of the bible, which has slipped under the hem of his woolen jumper.

"Well it might be a nice break from listening to your idiotic voice, my dearest Chris." Chris mimes a breaking heart, rolling his eyes before slumping back into his chair. PJ breathes a silenced sigh of relief- he would have no idea how to explain this, lest of all in a Church, next to the grandmother of the very boy he is fantasizing about.

The service goes on, his clamoring erection unnoticed by everyone, including the beautiful Chris, sitting ignorant and dazzling beside him. His secret is safe for the moment.

Now all he has to do is figure out how to make it to the car without actually stealing this convenient bible.

Perhaps, praying isn't such a bad idea after all.

* * *

_How uncomfortable for you PJ ;D I hope you liked this! Thanks to NeverlandNat, LaReinaGuadalupe, Lexisfightingrobots and EnderBlaze23 for reviewing the last chapter! If anyone has a suggestion for the letters E, F and G, please let us know in the reviews :)_

_As always, this is for the wonderful DovahFinn :D_

_Until next time_

_xxx panfs_


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